Thursday, August 05, 2004
It's lonely at the top, it's scary and it's dangerous - without support
The higher you move in an organization, the bigger the pay, usually! The higher the pay, the greater the expectation that money is all you need. Unless you are blessed to work in a progressive, people-centered corporation, you are most likely expected to hold it all together and never, never show any sign of "weakness" or humanness, except maybe anger. The higher you are on the totem pole, the less support you normally get. It's like being at the top of the climb and seeing there is nobody watching out for you.
If your organization is looking out for you, not just waiting for you to fail and fall from the top of the pole, you have been provided with support, either from a coach or a mentor. If not, you are most likely very stressed and yet you may just see it as part of the job. It's become normal for you to need a drink to unwind, or to be angry and frustrated with your children, or you have headaches, or maybe a feeling of low level anxiety most of the time. Maybe you don't sleep very well, or you are impatient on the road, in line, with your partner, your employees. The higher the stress you have, the less you live in the present. You spend a lot of time reviewing the past and thinking about what will happen. Stress is not only bad for your emotional/mental health. As much as it can kill your spirit, it can also kill you. Period. Heart attack, high blood pressure, etc.
If you recognize that this sounds and looks like your life, stop. Just stop and breathe. There's a good chance that if that's your situation now, you are repeating something that happened in your childhood: that you grew up with little support and you are still (trying) to prove "you can do it". Take some time to reflect on whether this is what you want. Are you willing to have the courage to ask for support? To change the way you view this "weakness"?
Life continues to be difficult until we learn the lesson.
Marguerite Tennier
The coach who wants to change the world,
One Man at a Time
http://www.canadascoach.com
If your organization is looking out for you, not just waiting for you to fail and fall from the top of the pole, you have been provided with support, either from a coach or a mentor. If not, you are most likely very stressed and yet you may just see it as part of the job. It's become normal for you to need a drink to unwind, or to be angry and frustrated with your children, or you have headaches, or maybe a feeling of low level anxiety most of the time. Maybe you don't sleep very well, or you are impatient on the road, in line, with your partner, your employees. The higher the stress you have, the less you live in the present. You spend a lot of time reviewing the past and thinking about what will happen. Stress is not only bad for your emotional/mental health. As much as it can kill your spirit, it can also kill you. Period. Heart attack, high blood pressure, etc.
If you recognize that this sounds and looks like your life, stop. Just stop and breathe. There's a good chance that if that's your situation now, you are repeating something that happened in your childhood: that you grew up with little support and you are still (trying) to prove "you can do it". Take some time to reflect on whether this is what you want. Are you willing to have the courage to ask for support? To change the way you view this "weakness"?
Life continues to be difficult until we learn the lesson.
Marguerite Tennier
The coach who wants to change the world,
One Man at a Time
http://www.canadascoach.com
